Donor Egg, Problems You'll Face, You Need To Know
Victoria Nino
How to Talk to Friends and Family About Using ...

Starting a family is supposed to be filled with joy and excitement — at least that’s what society tells us. Right? We never expect to include a third person into our family building narrative, or that we will experience a deep level of grief while trying to conceive. You will likely find yourself doing countless hours of research and reading on the topic, attending therapy sessions and support groups and making friends with complete strangers on social media who also walked this path, who ultimately become your safe people. You may experience shock, grief, and even trauma as you navigate the path to parenthood via donor conception.

How to Talk to Friends and Family About Using an Egg Donor to Start a Family
Donor Egg, Good Things
Victoria Nino
The Inspiration Behind My Donor Conception ...

“Our Hearts Match” is a story of a T-Rex Mama and her beloved little brontosaurus, who talk very openly about their physical differences and confidently celebrate what makes them each unique, while also leaning in on what makes them “match” on the inside - their hearts.

I believe this book can not only help children learn about what connects us as family, but also help parents process the hard feelings around genetic grief and shift their perspectives to a more beautiful lens. This mother/child duo is proof that we don’t have to match each other to have dino-mite love and connection.

The Inspiration Behind My Donor Conception Children's Book
Donor Egg
Victoria Nino
Privacy vs. Secrecy: Navigating Egg Donation ...

The journey of conceiving a child via egg donation is a deeply personal process. We all enter this process with unique pieces of ourselves. Whether it be our family belief systems, personality types, religious backgrounds or cultural beliefs, no two people enter this process the same.

Privacy vs. Secrecy: Navigating Egg Donation and Who Needs to Know
Donor Egg
Victoria Nino
How To Choose An Egg Donor

Whether this is your first time considering egg donation or you’ve always known you would need an egg donor to build your family, choosing an egg donor is not an easy process. I’ve personally been through the egg donation selection process multiple times now, with multiple different agencies and egg banks. It can be exciting and equally overwhelming. I’m sharing some of the lessons I learned in hopes to make this process a bit easier for you. It can be exciting and equally overwhelming. I’m sharing some of the lessons I learned in hopes to make this process a bit easier for you.

How To Choose An Egg Donor
Donor Egg
Victoria Nino
Donor Eggs: Fresh or Frozen?

This is such an overwhelming decision to have to make and there are so many different schools of thought on whether it’s better to use fresh or frozen donor eggs. It’s easy to feel confused on which direction to take. This is truly a personal decision and heavily based on your situation and the plans you have for your future family. I’m not a doctor or expert by any means, but I have definitely been faced with this decision multiple times in my life and feel the need to share my personal reflection.

Donor Eggs: Fresh or Frozen?

Your Options

,

IVF 101: The Basics

,
IVF 101: The Basics

Infertility is a big undertaking and your entire world will revolve around it, understandably so. You will learn an entirely new vocabulary - things like TTC, IUI, IVF, FSH, PUPO etc. The new lingo on it’s own can be overwhelming. You will learn things about reproduction that, if you are like me, never learned in Sex-Ed class. You will start noticing things about your body you never realized before, because quite frankly the texture of your discharge just wasn’t important until now. You will have to work hard and contribute to your TTC plan every dang on day -  whether it be doctors visits 5-6 times in a two week period, setting 3-4 alarms a day to remember your injections, choking down 35 different supplements every night, sticking suppositories and other weird shit up your coot-coot, and examining your panties for egg whites like a mother fucking panty hawk, infertility will be your life.

, ,

Genetic Testing: To Test or Not To Test.

, ,
Genetic Testing: To Test or Not To Test.

If going the IVF route, you are likely faced with this dilemma- to test your embryos or not to test? Genetic Testing (otherwise known as PGS, preimplantation genetic screening), is when one or more cells is removed from an IVF embryo to test for chromosomal normalcy.The genetically normal embryos are kept for transfer, and the abnormal embryos are discarded. 

, , , , ,

Infertility Confession: I Am Not A Normal Pregnant Woman.

, , , , ,
Infertility Confession: I Am Not A Normal Pregnant Woman.

Now that I'm pregnant, people are starting to treat me like any, normal, "fertile" pregnant woman. Most would think, this is what I want - to feel normal. I don't blame them, I can see why people would think this. They might think - she's finally pregnant and past all the grieving and hard stuff, so this is the time to shower her with excitement and baby talk. But, I'm so not. 

, ,

Moving on to IVF and Overcoming The Sticker Shock

, ,
Moving on to IVF and Overcoming The Sticker Shock

I constantly ask myself... WHY did I spend all that time and money on IUI? Why did I do this to myself 5 fucking times!? Don't do what I did! Well, unless your insurance covers it, then, you do you! I can assure you, it will still take a HUGE toll on your emotional state. You really need to ask yourself if it's worth it. 

,

Egg Donation: A Donor's Perspective

,
Egg Donation: A Donor's Perspective

I got the pleasure of meeting an egg donor. I was in complete admiration of her. Although, she didn't consider her act of donating eggs admirable at all. But, I couldn't disagree more.  

There are many things in life you get paid to do that take guts, courage and heart. Think about the people that do jobs you consider "admirable". They are getting paid, but they are still doing a job that not many people would do, right?  They are putting their lives at danger, but sure, they still receive a paycheck.(Note - egg donors certainly aren't rolling in the dough. In most cases, the agency actually collects more money than the donor does.) 

,

Donor Eggs And The Painful Process Of Choosing A Donor

,
Donor Eggs And The Painful Process Of Choosing A Donor

I can't decide which was harder. Making the decision to use donor eggs.  Or selecting the actual egg donor herself. We were still struggling to find the perfect match.  So we decided to consult with our doctor for advice. To put it simply, she told us that when we find "the one" we would feel some sort of a connection.  She even went so far to say, "think about how you felt on your wedding day, this is just as important".  But how the hell are we supposed to do that without meeting the person?

,

Deciding to Use Donor Eggs.

,
Deciding to Use Donor Eggs.

I'm letting go of my broken eggs. I'm done. It's not going to be easy.  Lord I know that.  Life isn't supposed to be easy though, right?  I've been blessed in my life in so many ways. I know that.  Life has been good to me.  There are worse things that could happen to me, I always keep that in perspective.  We all have our things in life that kick us in the gut.  This is my "thing".  And I can handle it.

find me on Instagram @expectinganything

“I need this for my sister” she says to me as we were playing outside, referring to a special rock she found. . “Sister?” I asked, just to clarify. She looked me straight in the eyes and said it louder this time... “yes
I’ve spent most of my life saying “I’ll be happy when...”. When I finally get pregnant. When I lose the extra 15 pounds of hormone weight. When our business starts doing well again. When we are able to take fun vacations again
There is so much more to pass on to our children than genetics. . I am a strong woman because a strong woman raised me. Strong women aren’t just born that way, they are taught by watching the strong women in their lives work hard and stand up
I wasn’t just an oven baking someone else’s cookies. I was her home. . A therapist once told me to use the analogy of baking cookies in an oven when explaining to Flo how she came to be. This just never felt right for me. I was more than

all content copyright - Victoria Nino 2017